Addiction, anger, art, pain, Poetry, Uncategorized

Overdrawn

Stress
Like steam clouds
That make my mind boil up
And I am chaotically bouncing
— I am bubbling!
All through my
Chaotic mind

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Imagination, introspection, life, Poetry, relaxation, spirituality, Uncategorized

Looking at a Life

Spell me out in picture
A lamp with warm light thats is calm in the night
A racehorse that is swerving around every curve
A brushstroke pulling wet paint across paper
A gasp in a balloon as it zips away empty
A ridge a on a quarter that is beginning to feel smooth
A book being clutched in the fold of an arm
A weather vane as it tilts to the slow steady wind
And the hum of the strings on an old violin
As if intimate and insignificant moments, where ever I find them
Are like mirrors of every different, small sensation of being human

anger, introspection, mental health, pain, Poetry, relationships, romance

I Hate It

so angry

to hide from

the disappointment

of the fragile heart I have

underneath

so angry

because I can’t take on

being guilty

can’t admit my helplessness

am trying not to expose

my generous

vulnerability

such overly generous

not meant for you to cast away

vulnerability

love, Poetry, relationships, romance, Uncategorized

Listless Daydreams

Visions of life I hope I deserve
I’ve long awaited –
I’ve grown, I’ve preserved
I’ve seen what I set out to see
I am ready for life beyond me
To share passion in life that grows daringly deep

Visions of the woman I am
The ambitious career and the family plan
With late nights of inspiration
And the long days of mental exertion
With every mistake and every error
I see myself moving forward though every terror

Visions of the moment I see
The way I want it all to be
A simple story with someone I meet
I’m unaware, its all discreet
That way he simply wants me back
Makes the effort, picks up the slack
And I am so amazed –
From all my tired, pursing days

Visions of a life together
With someone I have never met
I’d like to touch your face to mine
And trace my fingers along your neck
I want to share love so big
And not have to hold it back
Or play into the politics
Of how partners should interact

Visions of the love I see
The way he’s looking back at me
The way I hear it in his voice
That I am his excited choice
The touch of hair he’s pulling back
Across my face, behind my ear
It calms my anxious, cautious fears

Visions of the life I want
I create them every day
The songs I sing my child
As in my arms he lays
The moments I feel so meant to be
There’s more than I can say
With love much greater than I can dream
It seems so hard to delay

Visions of the dream I can give
To a family I could love
To this passion that I am within
That will never, just dissolve
I have visions of the life I want
And visions I will resolve
A bright and startling passion
That needs not be dimmed off